Goths, I love 'em! I even used to be one for a bit (well, I was a Didi-Goth for at least 6 months). But there's one thing that troubles me about our cheery friends: what to do they do in summer? All that makeup, long black leather and rubber must get very sticky. I think we should show our respect for these poor unfortunates, struggling to stand out from the vanilla crowd despite blazing temperatures and sunshine that puts the rest of us in shorts and vest tops. Join me in celebrating the majesty of the Goth, who, eschewing any practicality whatever, still has the commitment to don a full length leather trenchcoat, stupid New Rock boots, and half a Superdrug counter of makeup. All hail the Hot Goth!


Gothasol Fail


Gothiness: 2 Sweatiness: 2
Now, in principle, everything is in its place and as it should be. Gothy dress? Check. Black Hair? Check. Gothasol in the sunshine? Check. But what in the name of Beelzebub's rejected bastard firstborn son's name is this woman on? The Gothasol provides no shade whatsoever! It's held at a jaunty angle! She's grinning! She's missed the point completely. What does she think it is - some sort of musical? She should be excommunicated from The Church of Goth immediately. What an absolute disgrace.

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

Oh! The Daystar has addled her brain! She may be too far gone to ever recover...

The Impressive Clergyman said...

You're probably right, Anonymous. She's most likely gone mental in the light.

PsychoJenic said...

Perhaps she has stumbled. Thankfully into the shade, away from the Daystars burning rays.

The Stool Pigeon said...

She looks like she's dressed in a goth Halloween costume but would never dress that way otherwise.

Sakara said...

she could have had a can of Ironbru....you know what that does to goths!

Miranda said...

Don't be silly. It's a fashion accessory. :P

Not all goths burn after five minutes. It helps, for example, to be Italian, or some other ethnic background that can produce melanin if the need arises.

The Impressive Clergyman said...

As a bonfide ItaloGoth myself, I accept that I have the ability to produce a glorious nutbrown tan that would be the envy of many. But would instantly mean I look less like a Goth and more like Lou Diamond Phillips in Young Guns. And who wants that?

The Steampunk's Apprentice said...

I do, your eminence, and do I ever. I want that boy six kinds of bad. (great blog btw!)

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