Goths, I love 'em! I even used to be one for a bit (well, I was a Didi-Goth for at least 6 months). But there's one thing that troubles me about our cheery friends: what to do they do in summer? All that makeup, long black leather and rubber must get very sticky. I think we should show our respect for these poor unfortunates, struggling to stand out from the vanilla crowd despite blazing temperatures and sunshine that puts the rest of us in shorts and vest tops. Join me in celebrating the majesty of the Goth, who, eschewing any practicality whatever, still has the commitment to don a full length leather trenchcoat, stupid New Rock boots, and half a Superdrug counter of makeup. All hail the Hot Goth!

Purple Paddlers

Gothiness: 6 Sweatiness: -4
It was a hot day, but a freezing sea. These two Dark Delights jumped in and before they knew it they were overwhelmed by the Goth's biggest fear: enjoyment. Yes, you can clearly see these these two Gothettes are having fun. How dare they? I made up for it by finding a previously unpublished poem, penned by Samuel Taylor Coleridge. Apparently he binned this one and went with the Rime of the Ancient Mariner instead.
"Oh! Sea of chilly suffering, I jump in thee,
To drown my sorrows, at the shores of Whitby.
To look so glum was my goal,
but instead, childish enjoyment filled my soul.
I am Goth, 'neath the searing sky
I feed my pain with fish and chips from the Magpie."


Kat said...

Thy gothic musings fill me with bright glee,
Where ought to dwell the shades of misery.

Anonymous said...

I always thought Coleridge was more of a druggie than a goth.

GothsinHotWeather said...

Oh yes, terrible one for the Laudanum, old Sam. But he did spend his time standing on rooftops in the rain just like The Crow, plus he was mates with Wordsworth and was one of the founders of the Romantic Movement, which makes him more Goth than Kensington Market in my book.

Jeff said...

haha -4, nice touch

Creative Commons License Goths in Hot Weather by Tom Lenham is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Non-Commercial-No Derivative Works 2.0 UK: England & Wales License. Based on a work at All other territories © Tom Lenham, all rights reserved.